Human
by missannamc
Summary: Castiel is becoming human because the Angels are dying and he can't go back to Heaven after killing so many of his own brothers and sisters. some crazy weird two shot destiel au with a side of sabriel. enjoy!
1. Chapter 1

It was little things at first.

Castiel sneezed. It pretty much scared the crap out of him. I still remember the what-the-fuck-just-happened look on his face after he sneezed. I had realized that was something that would lead to this.

Now, Cas needed to eat every three days. I've caught him napping once or twice. He rammed his hand against my car by accident and it caused him pain.

He couldn't smite. He didn't have his superman strength or invincibility.

Cas was vulnerable. And so very human. Maybe not completely. Not yet. But it was coming.

And it was about damn time him and Gabriel had sat me and Sam down to talk this shit out.

Castiel was standing across from where Sam and I were sitting, shifting from side to side. That was another thing I could add to my growing list of Cas the Human. He couldn't stand still anymore.

"Cas is becoming human," Gabriel finally blurted out. I snorted.

"Well no shit. Why?" I demanded. Sam set aside his shocked face to give me a passing raised eyebrow.

After all, how could I not notice Castiel was becoming human?

And I had figured out a long time ago that you don't mess with the nerd angels. So I decided to wait for him to tell me. He never did. He tried being sneaky about taking Sam's leftovers and his little naps (number 8 on Cas the Human list: he snores), but it was obvious. To me at least.

Finally Cas spoke up, "You knew?"

I raised my eyebrows at him in genuine shock, "You didn't think I'd notice? I'm not that stupid, Cas."

"No! No, that's…that's not what I meant, Dean. Of course I don't think you're stupid and of course I thought you'd notice…" Castiel rambled on for a moment. (Cas the Human list number 14: Cas rambles more now. Probably has something to do with the lack of angelic headspace. Tip? Let him ramble. It's his way of thinking out loud. Let him work through his thoughts. Eventually the point will show itself.)

"I just…I thought you'd say something," Cas finished.

"I was waiting for you to tell me," I said with a shrug.

"I'm sorry," Cas said after a long moment.

"It's okay," I said, then offered him a smile to which Cas returned. Sam cleared his throat, drawing our attention to him.

"Okay, so. Cas is becoming human," he looked up at Gabriel. "How? Why?" Gabriel ran is fingers through his hair, a reflex he'd learned from Sam.

"It's because of all the angels at that are dying in Heaven. Tons are being slaughtered. Even I'm feeling the weight of losing so many of my brothers," he sighed. "It's even worse for Cassie because he's been…" he trailed off.

"Exiled," Castiel supplied. Gabriel frowned.

"Exiled from Heaven. He has no contact with other angels. I don't have enough power to help him keep his Grace."

I watched as Sam chewed on the inside of his cheek, "Well…what are our options?"

"There's one. But it's completely beyond dangerous and flies straight into stupid."

I rubbed my forehead and sighed, "I'm not going to like this, am I?"

"I could take him back to Heaven. He would gain his powers back. But he wouldn't be able to leave for at least a year on Earth to be completely healed. And, of course, there's always the thing about the other angels finding him."

"If they found me, they would kill me," Castiel said, more to himself then anything.

"I'd make sure they wouldn't."

"If they found out that you are hiding me, they'd kill you," Castiel said more firmly this time.

Gabriel sighed, "Just think about it, okay?" he said as he approached Sam. He gave him a small smile. "Would you care to accompany me?"

I almost cracked a smile as Sam chuckled and shook his head at Gabriel, but took his hand anyway. And then they disappeared.

Castiel took Sam's spot on the bed after a long moment of silence.

"Dean?"

"Yeah, Cas?"

"I'm…" Cas trailed off, which got me to look up at him.

"Cas?" is said again, trying to not let how much Cas's tone was worrying me and failing miserably.

"I'm afraid," he said finally as he resolutely stared at the floor.

"Of being human?" I asked.

"Yes," he whispered.

"It's okay to be scared, Cas. Everybody's afraid of something. And this…this is…it's something," I said with a humorless chuckle, but Cas smiled slightly.

"You're afraid too." I paused and watched as Cas's bright blue eyes traveled from the floor to meet mine.

"I'm afraid for you," I said honestly. "This is…big. This is going through a complete change. I-I mean you _define_ yourself as an angel. Would you be okay without that definition?"

"I think I could survive if I had help," Cas said with a shy shrug that had him looking at the floor again. Cas the Human List number 31: Cas seems to be a bit more self conscious.

Castiel sighed and looked up at me again, "I won't be helpful anymore. Not like I used to be. I'll be more useless then a child." I shook my head.

"That's not true. You're such an important part of this group, Cas. Angel or not. Okay? Are you listening?" Cas nodded. I nudged him slight, a smile on my face.

"And don't worry about the human stuff. I'll show you the ropes, okay?"

"And hunting? You'll teach me that too?"

"Yeah. That stuff too."

It was a long time before we spoke again, until we moved again. And it was Castiel who broke the stillness. He took my hand and intertwined our fingers together.

"I don't care if I'm human or I'm an angel. As long as I'm with you."


	2. Chapter 2

There are days when Cas just needs to get away from the brothers and Gabriel.

Although Gabriel isn't around all that much anymore, seeing as how he needs to spend the majority of his time in Heaven now. Castiel understands the pressure that is now on his brother's shoulders. Gabriel literally had the fate of Heaven forced upon him, and considering neither the brothers nor the angels know how to kill the Leviathans, angels were being slaughtered by the handfuls. And there was nothing Castiel could do to help.

It was hard because he could_ feel_ the power of Heaven slowly drain from him. He felt the death of each brother or sister ripple through him like the very human emotions he felt more clearly every day.

He was becoming human. He was losing his powers. And he was exiled from Heaven to find a way to restore them.

He didn't tell Dean or Sam about this revelation. He could see the pity in their eyes when Gabriel would pace back and forth in front of the three of them as he updated them on the war in Heaven.

Usually Castiel could ignore it, but there were just some days when he couldn't take it.

And, on those days, he would leave the brothers and Gabriel in favor of a small town in Lexington, Nebraska.

After the ordeal with Jimmy and his family, Castiel had taken it upon himself to visit them a few times a year.

More often now that he was slowly losing his grace.

As Castiel stood in the middle of the living room watching Claire study for some sort of history test while Amelia was busy in the kitchen, he wondered what it would be like to lose this part of himself. The angel had _defined _himself by his grace. What would he be without it?

He wondered if his grace would be replaced with a human soul…

Castiel liked watching over Amelia and Claire because they had the life that Dean and Sam dreamed of on a daily basis. He hoped that one day the boys would be given the chance to have a domestic life.

In the back of his mind he wondered if he would be a part of that life.

After a few hours he would return to Dean and Sam only to find Gabriel gone again. Neither boy would question where the angel had gone. They don't bother anymore. Castiel would never tell them.

But Dean would always sit next to him on the bed, lean his forehead against Castiel's and whisper, "It's going to be okay."

And, for the moment, Castiel would believe him.


End file.
